My wife, Babs, and stepdaughter, Jasmine, and I have done these workshops together since 2013. Each year, we are energized and inspired by the shifts in mood, outlook, and physical symptoms that occur within a just few days. We have been perplexed for years why this is such a consistent outcome and the last few years of neuroscience research has now explained what happens. It revolves around experiencing threat versus safety.

Fight or flight/ rest and digest

Any mental or physical threat, real or perceived, fires up your body’s flight or fight response through the sympathetic nervous system. The reaction includes stress hormones, inflammation, and elevated metabolism (fuel consumption); and you are on alert, anxious, and agitated. If the perception of danger is prolonged, then your body will respond with many different symptoms and often illness. Chronic stress (threat) keeps you in this heighted state and has been documented in many studies to be deadly. (1)

The essence of the solution lies in finding safety, which creates a “rest and digest” state that allows you to regenerate, drop inflammation, and slow down your metabolism; you feel relaxed with less pain. There are many ways to induce this state of safety. The workshop creates an atmosphere that allows this to happen. Dr. Robert Dantzer and several other researchers wrote an extensive review looking at the interaction of social factors influencing inflammation (pain) and how the inflammatory condition impacts your behaviors. (2) The main ones with most impact are:

• Social connection
• Positive affect (emotional state)
• Sense of control
• Optimism/ Hope

These workshops address all these issues and each of them is calming and directly anti-inflammatory communicated through the Vagus nerve (10^th cranial nerve). Dr. Stephen Porges, through his research and writing on the Polyvagal theory, has nicely laid out the afferent input into the midbrain and its efferent output allows safe human interaction. (3)

Social Connection

There are few times and places where you can feel safe with others. Life is competitive and it’s challenging to get a break. School has many layers of stress. Bullying is rampant. Close friends often turn on each other. Social media has intruded on privacy and quiet time. Research has shown that only about a third of families are relatively free of chaos. Other stressful arenas include sports, music, the arts, employment, and social status. Where’s there a place to rest?

We quickly realized that we didn’t have to do much after we set up the weekend. Participants in a safe and structured setting healed each other. It was also a remarkable experience for us being in the presence of those who are so supportive of each other. Oxytocin is a bonding hormone that is secreted in safe and social situations and is anti-inflammatory.

Positive affect/ play

The  weekend is also focused on re-connecting people with each other by sharing enjoyable experiences. Many of the activities are held in small groups of four or five. Participants can feel safe and it’s remarkable how quickly healing occurs. Much of the weekend is spent in play, which is a great venue to feel safe.

Babs and Jasmine are important contributors by leading you in rhythm, song, relaxation exercises, and sharing.

 Sense of control (The “ring of fire”)

There are many tools that allow you to regulate your own body’s neurochemistry and responses to threats. Just this sense of control is anti-inflammatory. Additionally, understanding the nature of chronic mental and physical pain will enable you to personalize solutions.

Awareness of your current state of being is the first step and we use a tool called, “The Ring of Fire.” Being aware of which color you are in at the moment, allows you to choose your direction. The green center is where you rest and regenerate. Blue is “life.” The red ring of anxiety and frustration is an inherent part of life that must be navigated skillfully. The goal is to be able to exist in any part of the “circle of life” on your own terms.

Hope/ optimism

People in chronic pain lose hope. The loss of hope contributes to the actual pain by increasing inflammation by speeding up nerve conduction. We will be sharing many stories of hope with the group. Regaining hope is powerful.

Comments from prior classes

“I’m still high from the weekend. And off all pain meds (even Advil) after 10 years on opioids…………..    Interesting how the class responded to my hooping (hula hoop). I can see Babs and Jaz doing a session, maybe a half-hour?  What do you think? Neuroplasticity, endorphins, fun!  Whether people catch on right away or not, laughter will be a result.  It could take practice, just like learning the cup song.  And for any resistant males, emphasize that it will improve their sex lives!”

“The program has been enormously helpful, and I can only conclude that it’s helping me to live in a more authentic way, which I feel makes my unconscious happy! I think when you have an abusive parent you have to suppress your feelings so much that suppression, avoidance and denial become your coping mechanisms. But as you know, it’s no way to live your life.

It’s possible I may still need surgery eventually, but if so, I feel that thanks to following the program, I’d be able to do it in a conscious and aware manner. Before, I felt very strongly that It would be a mistake.”

“………….  My family and co-workers are amazed at my progress. I am especially committed to no longer talking about my pain and to writing on a regular basis. I am getting (have gotten) my life back!”

Several commented, “I feel like I just spent a weekend away at camp.”

Reconnection to you

We have always been aware that when returning home, the pain will recur. But tasting freedom from pain is powerful. Every cell in your body is created to survive and thrive. If you allow yourself to be open to possibilities, it is a matter of time before you find your way to healing. Many participants have leveraged these workshops to a more enjoyable life.

References:

1. Rosengren A, Orth-Gomer K, Wedel H, Wilhelmsen L. 1993 Stressful life events, social support, and mortality in men born in 1933. Br. Med. J (1993); 307:1102–1105.
2. Dantzer R, et al. Resilience and immunity. Brain Behav Immun (2018); 74:28-42. doi:10.1016/j.bbi.2018.08.010
3. Porges, Steven. The Polyvagal Theory. Norton and Co., New York, NY, 2011.

Ffvb

through the Vagus nerve (10^th cranial nerve).

The post Experiencing Safety: Solving Chronic Pain: An Immersive Weekend Retreat first appeared on Back in Control.

The post Experiencing Safety: Solving Chronic Pain: An Immersive Weekend Retreat appeared first on Back in Control.

Feeling safe

Most babies feel safe and nurtured. They are protected from the realities of competing for resources to stay alive. They are free to explore, observe and learn. But all living creatures need anxiety and fear to avoid physical threats and obtain their basic needs. At some tipping point a child is exposed to this reality and life begins to change. The endless curiosity becomes encroached upon by survival needs. A major problem that humans have is consciousness. We have the same survival neuro-chemical response to many perceived threats that simply don’t exist. Our thoughts torment us and we can’t escape them. Unpleasant thoughts often become stronger with age and repetition and we develop “stories” about us and our life that seem real to us. We become trapped by them and there doesn’t seem to be a way out. Even if we are physically safe we are not safe from our thoughts.

The pursuit of happiness

So we do the only thing that seems logical, which is to live a life of “pursuing happiness”. It isn’t working well. In the midst of unprecedented opportunity, we are still dealing a lot of societal angst in the form of chronic pain, many forms of addiction, adult and teen suicide, bipolar disorders, depression, eating disorders, cutting, and bullying.

We pursue money, power, position, accomplishments, prestige, enlightenment, vocations and careers. The problem is that you are placing your peace of mind at the mercy of others’ opinions and surrounding circumstances; most of which you have little control over. Additionally, you are using conscious means to deal with the unconscious survival brain, which is estimated to be one million times stronger. It is a gross mismatch.

One of the most common pursuits is “winning.” Somehow, if we win something and have our name memorialized, that will squelch our internal demons. Intellectually, we know better. We have all witnessed the trials and tribulations of high-profile public figures who did have everything beyond comprehension. I was surprised to learn that Judy Garland struggled with addiction issues. I was a Michael Jackson fan and it was painful to watch him also slide into addiction. Robin Williams was a huge inspiration for me when I was in the depths of my own Abyss. I am in awe of anyone who has a wit that quick with his range of talent. We all know the stories of many lottery winners whose lives became undone after the windfall.

Why winning doesn’t work

The need to win is a problem. First of all, only a few can do it. Second, winning at costs seems to becoming the norm. It is disturbing to watch the politicians fight over issues based on party lines instead of doing their job of serving their constituents and running the government. In the legal world, prosecutors will withhold evidence that would clear the defendant in order to “win the case.” A person’s life is completely destroyed because of that attorney’s need to win. The practice is common enough that there are laws punishing this behavior.

Third, a core problem blocking us from happiness is anxiety and anger. When a good part of your life’s energy is spent battling these feelings and emotions, it is difficult to relax. The need to win creates even more anxiety, not less. The expectations placed on us, especially the children and teens are enormous and mostly impossible to meet. The anxiety is relentless.

This week’s Time magazine cover was titled, “How Kid Sports Turned Pro”. It describes the tremendous pressure experienced by families dealing with the demands and costs associated with creating a high-level athlete. There was one key paragraph that caught my attention. “According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, ‘burnout, anxiety, depression and attrition are increased in early specializers.’ The group says delaying specialization in most cases until late adolescence increases the likelihood of athletic success. (1)

Finally, when you achieve success, there is even more anxiety. How much success do you need? When is it going to end and you’ll crash? I was surprised to learn during my Hoffman workshop that I had much more anxiety when things were going well. I was raised in a chaotic household and when my mother was calm, we never knew what would set her off. We did not know how to relax or enjoy the moments of calm. If you are a golfer, you know that the stress of the round increases if you are having “the round of your life.”

Disconnecting and connecting

The bottom line is that you are not going to find your peace of mind using external circumstances to calm yourself. There are many ways to connect with who you are and enjoy life. Whatever approach you use has to first involve disconnecting from these survival reactions and THEN re-directing your attention. The sequence is awareness, separation, and reprogramming. If you try to skip the first two steps, you will be fighting a losing battle. In Stage 1 of the book and website, the expressive writing accomplishes awareness and separation and the active meditation is a method of reprogramming. In Stage 2, forgiveness is a more complex way of creating awareness and separation.

Winning is fine and to be commended. It just can’t be confused with attaining peace of mind, especially if the winning is at the expense of others. I get to win every day with patients and surgeries going well. I greatly enjoy it and I hate it when things don’t go as planned. But I have noticed that if I spend my energy congratulating myself and “keeping score”, it greatly diminishes the experience. Instead, I concentrate on every patient and every move of each surgery. I use the tools that I have presented in my book daily. My successes don’t quell my anxiety. It is by consciously calming down and staying connected to what is immediately in front of me that allows me to enjoy my life.

My friend, David Elaimy, who is a performance coach and I worked with my son, Nick and one of his best friends, Holt to optimize their performance under pressure. They were national level mogul freestyle skiers. They were consumed with winning and dedicated a significant part of their lives to attaining a gold medal. We kept telling both of them how winning was over-rated and to work more on enjoying the process. Holt won the National US Freestyle National Championship in 2007 in Park City, Utah. It was a great moment and one of the more remarkable accomplishments you will see under extreme circumstances. However, at breakfast the next morning he said, “You were right. Winning doesn’t change the fact that you have to get up the next day and continue to live your life.” To both of their credits, they have learned to enjoy the journey. Nick’s winning run – off the hill

Work vs. play

I have been as driven as anyone in using achievements to attain happiness. It was a disaster. About five or six years ago I realized that although pain pathways are permanent, so are play pathways. I made a decision to remove the labels of “work” and “play” and focus on experiencing all of it. This approach doesn’t mean that I have to like adversity. No one is asking you to enjoy your pain. But as you nurture your sense of play, you’ll shift off of your pain circuits and your life will change.

Play – better with others

Play is a powerful force directing your consciousness to a pain-free existence. You already have that capacity within you. You just have to re-connect with yourself. You spent a good part of the first five years of your life learning play. Even if you were raised in a rough environment, it’s there. I don’t’ remember much play with my family and I had essentially no friends during that phase of my life. I still built models, climbed trees and played with our pets. Play is an inherent part of our existence. At the workshops that we have held at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, we discovered that the key to people’s healing was to create a safe environment where the participants could share enjoyable experiences with others. We felt like we were in a giant sandbox and were able to relax and laugh. A common comment was, “We felt like we just spent a weekend at a summer camp.” We held a similar workshop in Seattle were excited and inspired with the healing that occurred in the group setting.

“Winning” is not the best answer to a successful life. Wake the fun up!!

1. Gregory, Sean. “Kid Sports INC. Time (2017); 190: 41-53.

The post Wake the Fun up!! first appeared on Back in Control.

The post Wake the Fun up!! appeared first on Back in Control.

Dr. Fred Luskin, author of Forgive for Good, my wife Babs Yohai, a professional tap dancer, and I will hold a five-day workshop at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY. The course is structured around education, hope, forgiveness, and play. It is based on the concepts presented in Back in Control: A Spine Surgeon’s Roadmap Out of Chronic Pain and Dr. Luskin’s work out of Stanford on forgiveness. Babs role is a critical piece in that she engages the group in somatic experiences, which connects thoughts to physical sensations. The activities stimulate the shifting of neurological pathways with many changes occurring during the week.

Pain pathways are permanent

Most readers of this website already know that pain pathways are permanent and tightly intertwined with anxiety and anger circuits. It has also been shown that mental and physical pain are processed in a similar part of the brain. We consider and treat them in the same manner. As you cannot rid yourself of any of these patterns it is necessary to create alternative pathways. This can be done in several ways:

• Awareness, detachment, and reprogramming
  • Begins with connecting negative thoughts with physical sensations and then substituting appropriate alternatives
• Calming down the nervous system
• Play

Play pathways are also permanent. People in pain lose their sense of humor. Reconnecting with those enjoyable pathways is a powerful way of shifting out of pain circuits.

My wife

My wife is a professional tap dancer and accomplished in Balinese mask dancing. She has expertise in rhythm and movement. In 2013 I asked her to be one of the faculty, as these types of practices can quickly reconnect and create new neurological connections. She was somewhat apprehensive about her role but agreed to give it a try. She ended up having a major impact. She began with having us “scan” our bodies for tension and letting it go. Next she had us moving around the room with and without masks. Participants began to relax and interact with each other.

The Cup Song

Then she pulled out The Cup Song, which I had never heard of. It turns out that is it viral on the Internet and has been around since the 1930’s. It was popularized by the movie, Pitch Perfect, starring Anna Kendrick.

The Cup Song

We all sat around the table and struggled at various levels to learn this rhythm with cups. We all began to laugh and the energy of the room changed. We kept trying and laughed more.

The shift

There are many factors that went into the success of the workshop but within a day of “learning” this rhythm, the participants began to experience a significant decrease in their anxiety. By the end of the week five of eleven went to pain free with the rest experiencing various degrees of relief of both pain and anxiety. We are staying in touch and almost everyone is continuing to move forward.

My vision for the week was to present enough of the structured care concepts so that people could implement them at home. I was hoping that most would engage and experience a shift in pain and mood over three to six months. There was not any part of me that envisioned the entire group experiencing a major shift.

Connection

I will be writing about the Omega week in a fairly detailed manner and will learn more as the group gives each other feedback. There were clearly other factors such as videos of patient’s successes, structured conversations, buddies, education, and active meditation techniques. However the concept of “playful” is what transpired as the most powerful force.

I have repeatedly pointed out that the concepts of the DOCC project are not a formula. What heals people is connection – to each other and to him or herself. The best part of who you are is when you are at play. Ready to Blossom

The Cup Song or the gym?

One of the participants had been experiencing quite severe back and leg pain for about five years. He initial improvement was punctuated by the anticipated ups and downs over the months following the 2013 Omega experience. Here is one of his emails:

“Ah, the victim role, that is me seemingly all the time. All of David Burn’s (author of Feeling Good) cognitive distortions are helpful to recognize in myself, but victimhood is the reminder most useful for me. I fall into it so easily!

I had a bad evening with the lower back several days ago. Instead of my usual hour+ strengthening and stretching routine, I practiced The Cup Song for 45 minutes and most of the tension in my back went away. I’m starting to synch the lyrics with the percussion! I’ll need to go back to Omega for The Natural Singer In You to work on my tone and pitch!”

Enjoy your day today

Play is not often mentioned in the context of chronic pain. Could The Cup Song be a key to healing from chronic mental and physical pain?

The post Rewire Your Brain – Omega 2015 first appeared on Back in Control.

The post Rewire Your Brain – Omega 2015 appeared first on Back in Control.